Bridesmaids Revisited

The cast of the movie Bridesmaids

I’m past the age where I go to see movies in the theater. Instead I wait for them to come out On Demand (if I’m really looking forward to seeing it) or on cable. When the movie Bridesmaids first came out, the chatter about this movie was overwhelmingly positive. It touted an all female ensemble cast, which is rare for a comedy. It was written by two female writers, which, to my feminist sensibilities, was encouraging. I admit to being unfamiliar with Kristen Wiig… I stopped watching Saturday Night Live long before they began calling it SNL… still, all in all,I had relatively high hopes for this movie.

What a complete waste of 125 minutes of my life. This movie was a slap in the face to me as a woman and a complete insult to my intelligence. I will say this movie would have been palatable if the actresses were still in their early twenties. A younger age would have somewhat excused the behavior of the characters. Women in their mid to late thirties acting like jealous teenagers is, not only unseemly, but UNFUNNY.

Take the lead character of Annie, granted her life is a mess, but wouldn’t you think she could step back and allow her best friend’s wedding to be about… oh, I don’t know… HER BEST FRIEND? Instead she whines and moans and engages in a jealous feud with her friend’s other friend like a child would. I understand that women nearing 40 want people to think they are younger than their age, but there’s absolutely no need to surrender your last scrap of dignity and act like a 2 year old with a case of the ‘mines’. If I were the bride, it would not have taken me more than 5 minutes to cut this woman from my bridal party. Melissa McCarthy’s character was cute, and I generally like her as an actress, but this part was not worthy of an Oscar nomination.

It’s bad enough when movies show women in a jealous feud over a man, but over a friend? Most people by the time they reach their late 30’s have grown past this kind of behavior. I guess that’s why it’s supposed to be ‘funny’. Unfortunately, the very behavior they are lampooning in this movie is the kind of behavior that girls in their teens will think it is normal to exhibit when they hit 35 because of movies like this.

I would think that two female writers who wanted to make a movie about women could come up with something a little more aspirational and a little less insulting. Or maybe I am being naive to think that such a movie would get the funding in the first place.

Mother knows best

We’ve all heard the saying, but in my case, Mother knows ALL. It’s a little eerie when your mother can predict everything from when it will snow on the other side of the world to your bodily functions, all with the accuracy of a German train schedule. Let me explain.

My mother spends her winters in New Zealand, I spend mine at home in Quebec. At the end of the winter, at least I thought it was the end, I boldly stated, “That’s it for the snow this winter.” My mother correctly predicted it would snow once more within the week… it did. I’ve mentioned in another blog post that I am currently going through menopause. One of the symptoms of that is irregular periods. My mother can, just by talking on the phone to me, tell me within a few days, that I can expect a visit from Aunt Flo. Medicine can’t, but my mother can.  I have bestowed upon her the nickname of NOSTRA-MOM-US. When asked how she knows, she just laughs and says, ‘I have no idea”.

As an atheist, I look for the explanations behind the un-explainable. The only one I can come up with is experience. There are many things that I can ‘predict’ just through past experience. None of them quite as impressive as some of my mother’s ‘predictions’, but then she has over 20 years more experience on the planet than I do.

I can’t be the only child on earth who’s mother knows all. If you have a NOSTRA-MOM-US, please use the comment section below to tell me about her ‘predictions’.

Of course, my mother’s predictions are nowhere near as accurate as the real Nostradamus…

Now that’s accurate!!

My favourite television romance

Amy Farrah Fowler and Sheldon Cooper

I’m a geek for The Big Bang Theory. I’ve seen every episode multiple times. Usually when a sit-com adds a new character, especially a new love interest, the show’s quality plummets. When Mayim Bialik joined the cast of The Big Bang Theory as Amy Farrah Fowler, the show got so much funnier. The chemistry between her and Jim Parsons is unparalleled.  To illustrate, I thought I would share my five favourite “Shamy” moments from the past season in the order they aired.

Sheldon and Amy Cuddle

Sheldon asks Amy to be his girlfriend 

Sheldon gives Amy a gift (or THE TIARA) 

 Fun With Flags (or, as I like to call it, HANSEL AND PRETZEL)

Playing Doctor 

It may be the oddest relationship on television, but it works. I can’t wait to see what Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady have up their, oh so creative, sleeves for next season.

A day by any other name … is still a day off.

Tomorrow is Victoria Day in Canada, well, most of Canada. I live in Quebec, where tomorrow is called National Patriot’s Day and looks like this.

I can’t help but wonder if I am the only one who sees the irony of calling the holiday Patriot’s Day while, simultaneously, separating yourself from the rest of your country. That doesn’t seem very patriotic to me.

I have been wondering what the reasoning for this decision is for a while now. I would like to invite anyone who knows the historical reason to please post it in the comments section below. I am looking for the real reason, not insults about Quebec, or English speaking Canada. I am not trying to spark an argument. I really want to know the reason behind this.

Whether you call it Victoria Day or National Patriot’s Day, I hope your holiday weekend is a good one.

Artist or Athlete?

Adam Cooper in Swan Lake from the movie Billy Elliot

Ballet has long been one of my passions. I grew up taking lessons. I idolized all of the greats over the years. I swooned over the well muscled men in their tights, that leave less to the imagination than football pants, jumping higher than any NBA player ever dared to dream. There is no more perfect physical specimen than a male ballet dancer.

When I was little it was Rudolph Nureyev that captured my imagination with his grace and strength. Here he is dancing with the great Dame Margot Fontegyn.

 

Currently some of my favourites include Adam Cooper and Chi Cao.

 

Adam Cooper in Swan Lake

Chi Cao reherses Don Quixote

But the one dancer who sparked the most fantasies for me was, is and always will be the incomparable Mikhail Baryshnikov. It’s hard not to be in awe of his presence even when he’s just practicing his jumping.

 

Here he is dancing in Giselle and showing us what all that practice does.

 

 

Even when he performs another genre of dance, Baryshnikov’s strength, presence and pure sex appeal cannot be equaled.

It’s impossible to watch these men perform and not see the raw masculine athleticism along side the amazing artistry. The discipline and dedication a professional ballet dancer must have is something to be admired. They are athletes in every sense of the word.

Happy Mother’s Day

There’s nothing like a Mother’s love. So this Mother’s Day, I thought I would share some images from the animal kingdom that illustrate motherly love, patience, nurturing  and protection.

 

LOVE

 

 

 

 

 

PATIENCE

 

 

NURTURING

PROTECTION

WHEN YOU’RE ON THE WRONG PATH, A MOTHER WILL PICK YOU UP AND SET YOU STRAIGHT.

ADOPTIVE MOTHERS GIVE SELFLESSLY TOO.

Here’s to all the Moms out there. Thank you so much for all you do.

Dream a little dream

The Dream by Salvador Dali

Ever since I entered menopause, I have been having the weirdest dreams. Vivid, colourful and disturbing dreams. Apparently this is a normal symptom of menopause along with insomnia, hot flashes, memory loss, loss of sex drive, night sweats, vaginal dryness, irregular periods, memory loss, mood swings, depression, irritability, fatigue, hair loss, growing of facial hair, incontinence, bloating, memory loss, brittle nails, breast pain, joint pain, headaches, itchy skin, tingling extremities and memory loss among others. Oh yes, menopause is a wondrous time of life. I am going through this next phase of life naturally, as generations of women before me have. Going with the lack of flow, as it were. I’m one of the lucky ones, my most disturbing symptoms are the weird dreams, insomnia (which has finally passed after two years), the occasional hot flash (which also seems to have passed) and memory loss. The memory loss is the most frustrating if only because I have always prided myself on my great memory and tremendous vocabulary, and now I continually find myself grasping for words that would once come trippingly off my tongue. It is for this reason that I have been calling this stage of my life MENTAL PAUSE.

Getting back to the weird dreams. Last night I had a doozy. I dreamed that I had fallen asleep and woke up to find that my face had been tattooed. Not just a small, cute tattoo either. A large rectangular tattoo the size of a tarot card starting at my left cheekbone and ending just below my jawline. The image was of skin being pulled off my face, to reveal a beating red heart (the organ, not the Valentine’s Day shape). Yes the heart was animated and beating. I was in a warehouse and I wandered around looking for someone, anyone who could explain what had happened. There was no one around, but there were mirrors everywhere I looked, so I couldn’t help but look at this thing on my face. It was then that I woke up and tried to shake the image from my mind to no avail.

If anyone knows anything about dream analysis, I would be very interested on your input. If you are also a menopausal woman who has weird dreams and want to share one of yours, please feel free to do so. For now I’m chalking it up to hormones and will try to go on about my day as usual.