Auto Erotica


When I dream, I dream big. I am a lover of all things luxury and cars are no exception. These are a few of my favourite vehicles to dream of one day owning, or at least driving around the block.

Bugatti Veyron

The Bugatti Veyron Super Sport is the world’s fastest street legal production car. With a top speed of 431.072 km/h (267.856 mph) this is the stuff of wet dreams. Rarely do such power and such beauty exist in the same package. At a sticker price of 2.4 million dollars, I’ll be dreaming about this for the rest of my life. It’s pretty on the inside too.

I would be doing this car an injustice if I didn’t include a video of it in action, driven by someone who appreciates it’s power.

Next on my wish list is the 2009 Mercedes Maybach Zeppelin. Priced at a mere $677,000 US dollars, this car might be within reach if I ever win the lottery. The image at the start of this post is of the interior of this car and the luxury doesn’t stop there.

Mercedes Maybach Zeppelin

It just whispers seductively, ‘Sit back, relax and let me pamper you.’ In fact if you’re lucky enough to be cradled anywhere within this testament to luxury, that’s exactly what you can expect.

This next work of art is surprisingly priced at a reasonable $444,000 US dollars. Which means I will be able to afford one if I also plan on living in it. Judging by the beautifully appointed interior, that’s a distinct possibility. The 2012 Rolls Royce Phantom.

And the exterior isn’t too shabby either.

2012 Rolls Royce Phantom

This car is pure elegance in every sense of the word.

The last vehicle on my list was just brought to my attention this evening. It may not be the epitome of luxury (yet), but it looks like a ridiculously fun toy to own, or at least fly around the block in. Yes, I just said FLY.

This is the Moller Skycar M400.

It seats 4 which makes it perfect for that family outing, or for storing your golf clubs. The SL model has a maximum speed of 579 km/h or 360 mph and boasts vertical take off and landing in just a 35 foot diameter (or 10.7 meters). It retails for $500,000 US dollars, which, if you travel a lot, could pay for itself in convenience alone on your first time not having to go through the airport security line. It has a maximum range of 750 miles (or 1207 kilometers) between fuel ups (great for island hopping in the Caribbean) and flies on ethanol.

Now you know a little more about what fuels my fantasies.

The good old days


The other night, I was really looking forward to watching a movie I remembered very fondly as being one of my favourites from my teen years, Little Darlings. I remember watching this movie multiple times in the theatre and just loving it. So I settled in and started watching. What was I thinking? Were the hormones that coursed through my veins making me insane? This movie was one of the worst pieces of schlock. I couldn’t even sit through the first 30 minutes before turning it off. Then I remembered a truism I had conveniently forgotten. Just because you remember it, doesn’t mean it was good.

People have this annoying habit of looking back in time and only remembering what they liked about an era. For instance, Americans are always hearkening back to the 1950’s as the time when America was perfect. From the fashion, to the music and the cars, the 1950’s were the good old days. I’ll give you the fashion, clothes were beautiful and flattering then, but undergarments, weren’t so cute… or comfortable. Men had to wear suspenders to hold up their black dress socks.

And women were wearing foundation garments like this.

Then there was the music. The beginning of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley, Buddy Holly, so much good music. But the 1950’s were also the decade that gave us novelty songs like How Much is that Doggy in the Window? and Purple People Eater and spoken word songs like What is a Wife? and Big Bad John.

The cars of the 1950’s were some of the most stylish and impressive in the history of cars, the Thunderbird, Cadillac and Chevy’s of that era are considered American classics. But then there’s this.

Sure the 1950’s were a good time in American History if you were a white man. The American dream was within your reach. If you were a woman you had this kind of existence.

If you were black, America looked more like this.

And the above image is a kind example. I could have shown a lynching.

So what is the point of all of this, you ask? When looking back, take off the rose-coloured glasses and understand…

JUST BECAUSE YOU REMEMBER IT DOESN’T MEAN IT WAS GOOD.