Tag: Confession

Confession: I like men in drag

 Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Ewan McGregor in Velvet Goldmine

The other night, I watched the movie Velvet Goldmine again and it got me thinking about how much I like an androgynous man.  Velvet Goldmine hearkens back to the days of Glam Rock and features hot men like Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Ewan McGregor and Christian Bale in make up. Ironically, Eddie Izzard is one of the few stars in the movie not wearing make up.

I began to notice men in the 1970’s, when rock stars like David Bowie, Marc Bolan and the New York Dolls were popular. It was the days of men with long hair, glitter eye shadow and tarty lipstick wearing flashy clothes and it made a big impression on me. These men with their blatant gender bending were so much sexier than the average Jock type to me. They were rebelling against the traditional male uniform. They were bravely flouting convention in an in your face way that was hard for me to resist. You see, I also have a rebellious spirit and a keen fashion sense and I related to these men, who I saw as so much more manly than the Jocks or the Suits. These men were breaking new ground, they were leaders. They were the new Alpha Male in all of their peacock feathered splendor.

 

Marc Bolan of T Rex

The New York Dolls

David Bowie as Ziggy Stardust

Then there was Tim Curry in the Rocky Horror pictures show licking his shiny red lips with a naughty, mischievous glint in his eye and singing “Give yourself over to absolute pleasure”. It didn’t matter that he was into both women and men, in fact that was a large part of the lure for me. He was unabashedly crashing through sexual boundaries.

 

Tim Curry in the Rocky Horror Picture Show

Since those days there have been very few examples of in your face male androgyny. In the 1980’s, Prince filled that role. At once, both masculine, feminine and oozing sex from every pore, Prince was my fantasy in those days.

 

Prince, from the Lovesexy Album cover

In the 1990’s Marilyn Manson took androgyny to a much darker and more Gothic place with his flawlessly painted face and very masculine voice. he merged male and female into one hot package.

 

Marilyn Manson

Currently, the most famous example is the aforementioned Eddie Izzard who has been quoted as saying, “Women wear what they want and so do I”. That attitude is irresistible to me.

 

Eddie Izzard, in all his glory.

Androgyny isn’t just dressing in drag. It’s a mindset. It’s a lifestyle. It’s sexy as hell.

Confession: I love being alone

I am single. It’s not sad. It’s not anything to be pitied. I love being single. More than that, I love being alone. I don’t understand why it is that people think this is such a horrible fate. When I am asked if I’m married and the person hears the answer is no, the response is invariably something along the lines of, “Well, don’t worry, you’ll find someone.” I have news for you. I’m not worried, and even more radically, I don’t want to find someone.

No I am not depressed. No I am not lonely. No I am not bitter. No I don’t sit around all day crying. I am living MY life the way I PREFER to live it… by myself.

I like only taking care of myself. I like a life without arguments or compromises. I like doing what I want to do when I want to do it. I like travelling alone. I like going to the movies alone. I even like eating at a restaurant alone.

I have tried marriage. It doesn’t work for me. Before you ask, ‘What about love?’  That’s what my family is for. I hear you thinking, ‘What do you do about sex?’ Not that it’s any of your business, but I prefer doing that alone too. (at least I know the job will be done well). As for companionship, I have relatively no need for company… other people just mess things up. Conversation is wonderful when it’s intelligent and productive, which, sadly, is rare and preferably done over the phone or online.

For me being alone does not equate to being lonely. Being alone equates to being free.